Your child may start showing signs of stubbornness as early as infancy. The idea that several other parents are experiencing a predicament like yours should give you some comfort. Your approach to dealing with your difficult child will have a huge impact on the sort of adult they become. The phases of toddlerhood and adolescence are regarded as the most challenging to manage. (Stubborn Child)
Features of Stubborn Children
It is not necessarily a sign of stubbornness for your youngster to be picky in expressing their will. Between tenacity and stubbornness, there is a thin line. The following are some signs of obstinate behaviour to watch out for:
- Extremely perceptive and imaginative
- Question everything, which may be interpreted as revolt
- They constantly seek your attention because they want to be heard and want to be recognised.
- Very independent They commit to any task they do and won’t stop working on it until it is finished.
- Maybe prone to frequent outbursts
- Demonstrate leadership qualities and may even come off as dictatorial
- Will proceed with each task at their own pace.
- No matter how risky or even if it means breaking the law, don’t hesitate to go for what they have their hearts set on.
Stubborn Child Psychology
Understanding why your child is acting this way and what causes them to behave this way can help you deal with them in the best way possible. Your child can be determined without being obstinate, but they are two different things. Being obstinate is described as “the reluctance to modify thinking, behaviour, or action under any external pressure,” whereas determination is defined as “firmness of purpose.” Stubbornness is a trait that may be inherited as well as taught via social observation. But, this behaviour may be managed to make your youngster more well-rounded and prove productive.
How do you deal with kids that are stubborn?
Stubbornness can appear in children, adolescents, or even infants and can last far into adulthood. It’s crucial that you as a parent figure out how to deal with your child’s resistance so that you can control their behaviour without becoming frustrated yourself. These are some methods for dealing with a recalcitrant child:
1. Use Diversions
There are probably certain topics that you and your child will agree to disagree on, including car seats. If taking a trip turns into a willpower battle every time, try to divert your child’s attention before you get in the car by talking about where you are going rather than how. When it comes to housework, try to turn them into a game by giving yourself a time restriction and including your siblings.
2. Provide a Few Options
The best method to encourage a child’s rebellious nature is to give them instructions. Provide them alternatives instead, as this gives them a sense of control over their life and allows them to autonomously select what they want to accomplish. Provide only two or three selections to minimise the number of possibilities available to your youngster and prevent confusion. Why not just say, “Where do you want to start?” instead? Ask them which they would want to clean first: the bed or the wardrobe, when it comes to organising their room.
3. Avoid Arguing
Children that are stubborn are always prepared to argue their point of view. Hence, don’t give them the chance. Instead, be a listening ear to your child’s opinions and encourage dialogue as opposed to confrontation. They are more inclined to listen to what you have to say when you demonstrate that you are willing to hear what they have to say.
4. Put Yourself in your Child’s Place.
Consider the situation from your child’s perspective and attempt to comprehend why your child is acting in this way. You must explain to them why you were unable to meet your commitment if you promised to take them to the park but declined because of the terrible weather. If you explain why you can’t go and schedule a later date for the excursion, you can prevent your child from seeing it as a broken promise.
5. Create A Connection
Never make your youngster do something they don’t want to. They will become even more disobedient and determined to do exactly what they are not supposed to as a result of this. Thus, try watching television with your child for a time if you want them to quit watching television and instead do their schoolwork. After a while, you may ask your child if they’d like to do their homework while you read your book or work nearby. A sense of community will therefore develop.
6. Refine Your Negotiation Techniques
Stubborn kids have a hard time accepting a flat-out denial when they ask for something. Therefore instead of imposing the law, attempt to bargain with them. As an illustration, if your child insists on hearing two bedtime tales, try to dissuade them by coming to an arrangement where they may choose one for now and one for tomorrow.
7. Keep the peace at home
Make sure your house is a place where your child always feels content, safe, and secure. Be kind to everyone in the house, especially your spouse, since kids pick up manners from what they see. As kids are prone to replicate what they see, it is crucial that you maintain harmony and refrain from fighting or insulting one another in front of the child.
8. Promoting Good Behavior
Set a good example and have a cheerful outlook at all times. If you often say “no,” “cannot,” or “will not,” your youngster is likely to follow suit. Instead of being critical of your child’s stubbornness and speaking without thinking, take a constructive approach to it. Asking your youngster questions that generate a “yes” or “no” response might help you turn it into a game. Ask questions with a “yes” response as the default response most of the time. This conveys the idea that your youngster is valued and heard.
9. Create routines
Maintaining daily and weekly routines might help your child behave better and achieve better in school. A set bedtime is necessary, and it should allow your child to get plenty of rest. Children between the ages of three and twelve may behave poorly due to lack of sleep or fatigue.
10. Establish guidelines and penalties
Children that are stubborn require rules and norms to succeed. Hence, have a family meeting to establish limits and spell out your expectations. Inquire about your child’s opinions on each of these and the potential repercussions. Although consistency is crucial, this does not mean rigidity. It’s crucial to be adaptable at times, such as when you’re on holiday or when your kid behaves admirably. This shows children that obeying the law is not meant to be oppressive but rather beneficial.
A Stubborn Child’s Problems (Stubborn Child)
It’s difficult to parent a difficult child since every little thing may become a battle every day if you don’t find a quick fix. Even if you may have found a tonne of material on how to manage obstinate child behaviour, every day presents a fresh obstacle. Finding a workaround for an obstinate youngster may be more beneficial than punishing them in some situations.
Furious Eaters (Stubborn Child)
When it comes to food and meals, most kids may be picky, and that tendency is amplified if the kid is also obstinate. Serving your child very tiny pieces of various foods and letting them select which ones they want to eat more of might be useful in this situation. You may also make an effort to make eating exciting by developing inventive dishes using wholesome components. Moreover, make an effort to include your child in mealtime tasks like setting the table. Providing them with a favourite dessert as a reward for finishing meals might also help things go more smoothly.
Assignment Blues (Stubborn Child)
Check to see whether your child struggles with the required homework or is overwhelmed by the volume of reading or information to be taught. If it appears that way, you may divide it into smaller tasks that you could finish one at a time. It might be possible to do it more quickly by taking brief breaks throughout. Combining it with another activity is an alternative. Spelling lessons, for instance, may be completed while watering the garden with your child’s assistance.
Wardrobe conflicts (Stubborn Child)
Every time your youngster wants to wear something that is inappropriate for the situation or the weather outdoors, arguments often arise. Sorting up your child’s clothes and switching them out every couple of weeks is one approach to lessen friction. Moreover, store the out-of-season attire to eliminate another potential point of contention. Lay out two or three different clothing and let your child chose from them whenever you want them to change. They will be pleased with their choice and you won’t be tearing out your hair in the process!
Bedtime Difficulties (Stubborn Child)
Your youngster tries to increase their adrenaline levels as night draws near by starting to run about. This prevents them from falling asleep quickly. Therefore, throw on some calming music and dim the lights around 30 minutes before it’s time to go to bed. Get your youngster to put on their pyjamas and turn off the television. Give your child the choice of picking out and donning the nightgown on her own or accepting your assistance to prevent a conflict. Ask your child if they have any stories to tell about their day before sending them in the direction of their bedroom. You may also ask them if they had a good or poor day to establish a connection.
It’s okay to have a stubborn child. In fact, it has been observed that kids with these traits frequently succeed in both their academic and professional lives. They are less likely to succumb to peer pressure, which helps them avoid engaging in harmful activities that their peers may be involved. Making an effort to understand your child and using appropriate disciplining techniques may go a long way in assisting them in developing into strong-willed yet responsible people.
This material should not be used in place of expert medical advice; it is just meant to be a guide.
Check more of our content by clicking HERE.